Recently, there has been heated opinions regarding the quality of our local Biomed doctors. Many unhappy experiences, lots of criticisms and too few praises. But I know for a fact that our doctors are doing a world of good for many families.
As my friend RR said, we consult with overseas doctor because during our time, there were no Biomed doctors in Malaysia at all. Now we have the luxury of having 3 doctors in our country. As RR said, they fill a void for families who are not able to travel overseas nor afford the higher cost. Again, it is a learning process for both doctors and families new to Biomed. Though we come into the Biomed world with high hopes, our first experience with it may not be kind.
We all compare notes on doctors, regarding cost, testing method, bedside manner etc. We bitch about their high cost, but strangely enough I don’t hear praises of how kind and helpful the doctors were. We criticize a doctor for not being able to ‘cure’ our children from the very first consult, but we never mention how cheap and affordable the bill was. Some complain that one doctor is too harsh and don’t want to consult them ever again. Yet some complain about how expensive another doctor is, even though the doctor was extremely kind and compassionate. We complain about the high cost and inconvenience of traveling overseas to see a doctor, but we never say that it’s well worth it. Sometimes we have to learn to express our gratitude, if not to others, to ourselves.
Many parents choose to do Biomed without a doctor, some do extremely well on it. For some like me, we rely on doctors a lot. Especially when we are at the initial stages. For some who eschew doctors, we rely on the advice of biomed friends. But always remember, it is unfair to place too much burden on a helpful friend, no matter how kind and generous they are.
It is an unfortunate human element, people are more inclined to talk about the bad and the ugly rather than the good. For every 10 criticisms we hear, we only hear 1 good feedback. Not because there were none, but because people are more passionate when they feel extreme anger and need to vent their feelings. Vent away my friends, we all need to lash out once in a while. Totally normal. But remember to move on.
If I listened to every opinion regarding each doctor that I consulted with, I would never even see them in the first place. And I probably won’t be where I am now, having a chance at a normal life. I’ve seen 8 Biomed doctors in total, and talked to a dozen more. Each and every one of them have their strengths as well as their shortfalls. I’ve never met a doctor that didn’t have a boatload of criticisms against them. Remember, for every doctor out there that you hate their guts, they probably saved a child’s life and forever be remembered in the family’s prayers.
For every Biomed doctor out there who were sued by families or attacked by the authorities, I grieve for the patients that were under their care and recovering from it. For example, Dr Andrew Wakefield, Dr Anju Usman, Dr Dan Rossignol. They are exemplary doctors, brilliant in their fields and have brought about much progress in many patients.
I just finished a 2 hour 45 minute phone consult with my homeopath, which everyone said was ‘cekai’ compared to her more famous colleague. But I nearly broke down in tears when I thanked her just now. After years of abnormal stools and horrific constipation, Yasmin now has a well-formed bowel movement every single day now. Something that none of our mainstream or biomedical doctors have been able to achieve. Not only do I thank her in my prayers everyday, I also hold no grudge for the other doctors who were not able to resolve Yasmin’s issues. But I still thank them for the other things they have helped me with.
For the doctors where I feel I got nothing in return, I chalk it down as a steep learning experience. I let go of the anger and move on to bigger and better things. Don’t let the anger and hate fester away at your soul.
Autism is such devastating condition to live with, a horrible 1 hour consult with a doctor is a piece of cake compared to what our children go through each hour. I would talk to as many horrible people I need to just so my babies can get better. We’re Super Mums, we can change the world right?